Girly Tumblr Themes

and then i'm up with the birds...










(I hope this helps a bit?)




"He just found it."

1,964 notesReblog
♥ Tagged as: oh dear,


Philosophy of Miyazakiby sapphiresky1410


The Gun

My apartment talks to me, speaks it’s sentances of mutters and groans

scratches and knocks

it hollers the language of open windows and locked doors

The dishes in my sink, like bodies in a mass grave, wail their testimony to my appetite

"THE MILK HAS GONE BAD!" screams my refrigerator whenever I open the door,

What the hell did you eat last night?” begs the bathroom

Geez you have a lot of black shoes!” marvels the closet

and the floors cry

"Stop scuffing your feet in those big-ass boots you neanderthal!!"

But the bedroom has gone quiet lately

the quiet of watching

the “I’m not so sure”

the quiet of a murderer’s silent steps on your stairway


walking home three alleys deep in dark with strangers behind you


the windows are looking in, not out

and no one knows what to say

it was a gift from a friend

after a break in…

my gun







just cause


closing in

take one step closer

and I’ll kiss you open mouthed metal

with it’s 38 caliber-tongue


bullet chambered


like words

bitten back

just in case

with a full clip of maybes,

my gun

has a bigger vocabulary than I do

but isn’t talking

it sits by my bed

sits in a box

and doesn’t talk to me

the way I don’t talk to someone to whom I have nothing

nice to




has nothing

nice to say

it says

This apartment is haunted,

not by anything that has happened here

but haunted by what could happen

what might happen here

and that says more than I ever could say

with the safety on

so what do you have to say for yourself


my gun

when it isn’t talking

it says plenty

I was 21

my first time

he was 34

and loved those 13 years between us

was perversely proud of every one as though each were a conquest he’d bedded and didn’t call again

and how stupid I was…

cleaning his house because he asked me to

and finding guns hidden in every room

a glock in his kitchen

2 revolvers in the living room

12 gage by the bed

open a random drawer, grope for a high shelf in the pantry

and my hand would close over another firearm

uzi in the closet of his empty spare room like burying treasure chests filled with

dirt, what was the point?

I remember asking him what he thought he needed all these guns for,

this was suburbia for fuck sake

and he offered some inane justification which


sufficed at the time, enough so I didn’t ask again.

Since then, I’ve learned to recognize signs that would have saved me a great deal of trouble

had I been familiar with them at the time.

He owned the movie

"Red Dawn"

and enjoyed holding me down

even when we weren’t having sex.

I’m almost the same age now

as he was when we were dating,

when I quietly left my virginity in that house

with all the guns watching.

It occurred to me as I got older

how horrible he was

how inappropriate

how predatorial

And it has crossed my mind, from time to time, that I should go and T.P his

precious fucking house

that he guarded so obsessively.

But I never have,

I’d probably get shot.

Yet somewhere between my age and his

I can’t deny that

I gradually learned I may someday have to fight for my life,

believed it so completely, that I keep a gun for the occasion

the way my mother used to keep dresses and shoes for parties she had not yet been invited to

It’s been a lesson that started with you

with your thick hands, fat smile and every wound you gave me

that I had to give to someone else

in an effort to shed them, and yet never did

if my gun is thinking anything

laying there, silently,

it’s thinking those thirteen years through

caressing each one with every oiled surface

rolling them through it’s multi-chambered brain

over and over and over

and i think, if we ever meet again,

if you ever put your hands to me


it might have something to say…

to you.


I remember reading a quote that I really liked… 
"It takes both rain and sunshine to make a rainbow"
On a gloomy day, remember that rainy days brings life to everything in our world :)

See more of HJ-Story at:
HJ-Story Facebook

The struggle is real.

"I hope one day
Your human body
Is not a jail cell,
Instead it’s a sunny
2pm garden with daisies
Thriving because of
Self love."

Alexa Evangelista, you deserve better (via happyasatree)


Doodled a Tiny Henny for yummytomatoes before taking a breake! Im gona finish Gazimon soon :>


Excuse me I didn’t said bisexual, I said BYEsexual

as in bye, bye, you can’t hit this


pet sematary in two caps



happy 4/13 everyone


happy 4/13 everyoneee!! I drew up a pic of the birthday kids for the occasion



happy 4/13 everybody

i saw some people reblogging this again and i’m too lazy to draw anything new, so happy 4/13 again!


a murder of crows



happy birthday you giant dweeb

• bb • female • infj • cancerian •
blogs art, motivation, sj things

Powered By: Tumblr Themes | Facebook Covers